gnarly

Something tumblr has taught me

fefeferi:

infinite-insanityy:

thesuperwalkingdeadangels:

gingeritt:

sargentwaffle:

natashhha:

“because of reasons” is always a legitimate reason

“because fuck you that’s why” is also acceptable 

“for science” is a good excuse

don’t forget the stars are not in position as a perfect reason to not do something

“Not since the accident.” can be the answer to any question.

you guys are leaving out “think of the children” as a way to persuade anybody to do something for you

esther-maarit

Anonymous asked:

What's the most illegal thing you ever did?

almanzapedia answered:

At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.

So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.

She refused to fix my grade.

In the end, she shit herself on stage.

I didn’t regret it.

sephyerite:

No mercy.